


Elementary, my dear Jim

by LeftHook, moonjockey



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Teachers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-06
Updated: 2016-11-14
Packaged: 2018-08-19 20:18:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8223554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeftHook/pseuds/LeftHook, https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonjockey/pseuds/moonjockey
Summary: Leonard had seen the young male teacher in the hallways once or twice, but he did not know the man had electric blue eyes until he showed up in the doorway in the closet that Leonard was supposed to operate in as a goddamn medical facility at Pike Memorial Elementary School.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> We've been writing this one off and on for a while and we actually completed it! Much more to come...

Leonard had seen the young male teacher in the hallways once or twice, but he did not know the man had _electric_ blue eyes until he showed up in the doorway in the closet that Leonard was supposed to operate in as a goddamn medical facility at Pike Memorial Elementary School. 

“Dr. McCoy, right?” the kid said, shoulders high and square. 

“Yes?” Leonard said, swiveling in his chair to face the door.

“Just what the hell are you doing here?” 

Leonard’s mouth fell open. “Excuse me?” 

“I said,” the kid--and he was not really a kid, but he had this cowlick of blond hair that stuck out over his forehead and slim-cut pants, so that the first impression he gave off was that he belonged in the high school across the street. “What the hell are you _doing_?”

“I am an M.D., _kid_ ,” Leonard laid stress on this, hackles rising despite himself, “and in case no one’s told you, I volunteered to fill in for the nurse at this school out of the generosity of my goddamn heart, since your last nurse quit a day before the school year started.” 

“Okay,” the kid said, holding up a hand. “First off. You are volunteering but that generosity came after at least ten calls from Principal Uhura. Second, I know what you’ve been asked to do. What I want to know is why Eli Goddard went to your office with a stomachache and came back to my class in _tears_.” 

Leonard sighed and looked skyward. “He was faking it. I thought as a teacher you would have noticed that.” 

The kid actually stomped his foot. “Haven’t you heard of bedside manner? That kid is 6 years old!” 

“Well Mr…?” 

“Kirk.”

“Well Mr. _Kirk_ I know you probably just left your parents’ house, but I actually am a parent and guess what? Kids aren't always telling the truth.” 

The kid’s eyes flashed dangerously. “Well excuse me, _sir_ , but no shit.” 

Leonard could not believe the guts on this kid. Storming into _his_ office all high and mighty. 

“Now see here....” Leonard stood up and was ready to give the guy a piece of his mind, when Kirk sighed. 

“I’m sorry, Doc. I’m nothing if not impulsive,” Kirk said, and ran his hand through his hair. “Can we start over?” The kid turned those impressive blue eyes on Leonard once again. “It’s been a long day and everyone in the school knows Eli’s parents, and we’ll be hearing about it, trust me.” 

Leonard frowned. “Well, you’ll just have to tell them their kid learned a lesson about faking sick. He’s fine.” 

“That’s...not exactly how it works.” Kirk folded his arms and leaned against the doorjamb. “Look, I know you don’t have any experience in elementary ed, but there’s a certain kind of parent that’s the worst. Their kids can do no wrong. If you tell a parent that, my job would be a living nightmare.”

“Well, that’s just a load of horseshit. I would never raise my daughter like that. Joanna messes up, she actually has to deal with the consequences.” 

“Wait, wait wait. Your daughter is Joanna Darnell?” 

“Yeah...and?” He didn’t need to have another teacher comment about his daughter. 

“Um, you’ve never heard the name Mr. Kirk before?” He looked amused now. 

“No dammit! As you have already pointed out, I’m new. Nice to meet you Mr. Kirk, but this conversation is over, goodbye.” Leonard’s patience had worn out and he stood up to push him out of the small office.

“Come on, dude. I’m your daughter's teacher.” 

Leonard gave up and sat down with his head in hands. “Dude? Dude?? My daughter is being taught by a juvenile delinquent.” 

Improbably, at this point, Kirk began to laugh, big and open-mouthed and frankly, kind of ridiculous. Leonard dragged his hands down his face. “Delinquent!” Kirk gasped. “Oh man. You gotta take it down a notch, old man. This young whippersnapper can’t keep up with you.” He wiped his eyes. “Seriously, though, Joanna’s a good kid. Feisty. I like her. She’s gonna do great in second grade.” 

“Eh,” Leonard mumbled, taken aback and mollified by the praise for his daughter. “Good. Because she is a great kid.” 

“I can tell.” Jim winked, annoyingly good-humored at Leonard’s name-calling. “I like you too, doc. But seriously, help a juvenile delinquent out and tread a little more lightly with the kids. See you around.” 

He was out the door, leaving Leonard blinking after him in the tiny, inadequately stocked office. 

 

Jim walked into Pike Memorial the next day smiling and waving at his coworkers as he walked through the halls. “Hey, Linda, how’s it going?” “Hey Patti! Have a good night?” He walked towards the 4th grade classroom of the only other young male teacher, Hikaru Sulu, and went right in.

“Oh man, Sulu, have you met that new doctor we have here?” 

Sulu looked up from the stack of papers he was grading with a smile. “No, what’s he like? I’ve heard a few things from the kids.” 

Jim smiled, thinking back to his conversation with McCoy the day before. “Oh, Sulu, Sulu. I’m gonna have fun with this one. He’s like a crotchety old man, but doesn’t even look like he’s out of his 30s yet.” 

Sulu shook his head, making a mark on a paper from his pile. “Oh wow. Well, don’t forget to play nice. Uhura can’t always save your ass.” 

“Oh, Sulu, always worrying. Oh hey, get this. He’s the father of Joanna, in my class.” 

“Which one is she again?” 

“She’s the one that’s a 40-year-old trapped in a 6-year-old’s body. It totally makes sense! This guy would be her father.” 

“Well I gotta finish this up before the kiddos come in.” Sulu fixed Jim with a knowing stare. “I know you’ve got a thing for the older dudes, but hands off.” 

Jim smiled. “Moi? Oh Sulu. Such a dirty mind! Doctor McGrumpypants is safe from me. Now you, on the other hand--”

“Get outta here!” 

“Kirk out.” 

 

McCoy’s name caught Jim’s ear later that day on lunch duty, striding between rows of chattering children. Well, not his name so much as--

“Don’t go to the new doctor,” Eli was telling his table. “He’s so scary. And he has a big whole bones in his office, like at Halloween except it’s not Halloween. You shouldn’t go to him.” 

_Bones_? It took Jim a moment before he remembered the plastic skeleton model he’d seen yesterday in that tiny nurse’s office and laughed out loud, filing this away for future reference. 

The kids all nodded their heads quickly. “Real bones?? I bet he took them out of that kid who went home yesterday!” 

McCoy’s daughter Joanna was sitting a few seats down. Jim didn’t know her that well yet, but he wasn’t surprised to hear her chime in. 

Joanna had her nose in the air. “Hmm. You know they’re not real bones right? He’s not even scary at all. He’s smart and if you cried, well then you’re just a baby.” 

Jim snickered and turned the other way when one of his kids looked at him. He didn’t like to get involved in kid drama--he preferred to let them play it out themselves. 

“Well if you don’t think he’s scary,” Eli continued, “then why don’t you go and see him if you’re so smart??” 

Joanna scoffed. “I don’t need to. He’s my dad.” 

All the kids gasped dramatically. Jim turned his snicker into a fake cough. 

“Well if he’s your dad then you must be scary too!” 

Joanna gave a long-suffering sigh more characteristic of someone twice her age. “Well you’re still a baby!” 

At this point someone spilled a carton of milk on the floor at the table across the room and Jim was forced to abandon the conversation for damage control.

 

Two nosebleeds and a skinned knee kept Leonard occupied the afternoon and then he had to do paperwork that was really poorly laid out and so he was totally occupied until a familiar voice floated around the corridor. “Hey Mr. Scary Bones.” 

He looked up. Kirk was leaning against the door again, hands in the pockets of his well-tailored gray pants, looking like the cat that ate the canary.

“M’name’s McCoy,” he growled, “in case ya forget since yesterday.” 

“Oh nope,” Jim said, shit-eating grin stretching wider, “that’s not what I hear. See, word is on the street that that poor shmuck,” he nodded at the model skeleton hanging behind Leonard, “is all that’s left of your three o’clock yesterday. Mr. Scary Bones.” 

“That’s _Dr._ Bones to you, kid,” Leonard snapped, and watched Jim’s eyes widen, first in surprise and then in delight. “And this, for your information, is Asclepius. He is a professional-grade full-scale replica of an adult human, which certainly disqualifies it from being any of my patients here at the school.” He paused to smirk. “Now, before this. That I can’t say.” 

“You managed to scare them real good,” Jim informed him. 

“I thought the kids would think it was cool,” Leonard admitted. “And I could point to different things if they needed to see them.”

“What are you doing here?” came Joanna’s voice from the hallway. Her suspicious little face appeared next to Jim’s waist. 

“Don’t be rude to your teacher,” Leonard said automatically. “And he’s just leaving. Wasn’t he.”

Kirk grinned. God, nothing fazed this kid. “Okay Joanna, you better take your dad home,” he said. “See you tomorrow. And you, _Dr. Scary Bones_. Take care.” 

Joanna still looked suspicious as Leonard stood, stretching the kinks out of his back and reaching for his briefcase.

“So that’s your teacher, huh,” he said to her. “What do you think of him?” 

Joanna shrugged nonchalantly. “He’s weird. But I haven’t decided yet.” 

Leonard smirked. “Me either, Jo-Jo. Me either.”

 

A week later, it was clear this kid was not gonna leave him alone. And worse, he had kept calling Leonard “Dr. Scary Bones,” shortened eventually to just “Bones,” and he. Would. Not. Stop. 

“Hey Booones,” Kirk drawled, leaning on his doorway yet again. 

Leonard shuddered. He was never a fan of nicknames. His ex-wife had always called him “Len.” He should have known from the start that wasn’t gonna work out. 

“Hello, Mr. Kirk.” 

“Come on, Bones. It’s Jim.” 

“Well then you can call me Leonard, not that godawful nickname.” 

Kirk smirked and sat down in the little chair reserved for McCoy’s patients. “Leonard?? But that’s so lame.” 

“It was my great-grandfather’s name.” 

Jim made a face. “I feel that pain. I have a terrible middle name from family too--”

“--My name isn’t terrible, Jim--”

“--which no one at the school knows and you will never, ever hear.” He folded his arms, slouching ridiculously in the tiny chair. “What’s yours?”

“A name no one at the school knows and you will never, ever hear,” McCoy parroted right back. 

Jim sat up. “Wait, really?”

“Yes, really, kid. And there’s no use itchin’ my ass about it, you won’t get it outta me.” Leonard could see the gears turning in Jim’s altogether too-quick mind. 

He still smiled, though. “You called me Jim.” 

McCoy rolled his eyes and turned back to his desk of paperwork. “Get outta here, Mr. Kirk.” 

“You called me Jiiiimmmm,” Jim sing-songed as he skipped out of the room. 

McCoy couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We appreciate all the comments and kudos! Thanks for reading!

Before Leonard knew it, a few months had gone by and he’d long since settled into his routine at the school. 

And without realizing it, Jim had unfortunately become part of that routine. 

“I had the worst dream last night,” Jim announced, walking straight into Leonard’s office without so much as a courtesy knock. “Turned out my grandmother wasn’t really my grandmother. It was a long con and really she and the gym teacher were agents from--”

“Oh hell no,” Leonard interrupted. “You are not marching into my office at 7:45 a.m. when I have six forms due, and you are sure as hell not doing it to tell me about a _dream_.”

“But Bones!” Jim gestured dramatically. “Dreams are the window to the soul.”

It was way too early for this. Leonard dragged both hands down over his face. “That’s a load of horseshit, kid, and anyone who tells you different is selling something. Dreams are random bits of memories and thoughts jumbled up without rhyme or reason. They don’t _mean_ anything.”

“But it was so crazy! Our gym teacher, Mr. Hendorff, you know, Cupcake? He ended up being my grandfather!” 

“Jim. I don’t know how I can put this nicely, but I don’t care.” 

“But!”

Leonard swiveled his chair to face Kirk. “I. Don’t. Care.” 

Kirk looked like a kicked puppy. Leonard almost, almost felt sorry when he looked at the kid’s big sad eyes. “Oh kid, come on. Those fake puppy eyes don’t work on me. I do have a daughter, remember.” 

Jim looked up at him from under his eyelashes. “You could make it up to me by telling me your middle name.” 

“Goodbye, Jim.” McCoy stood up, pushing Jim out of the door and closing it. 

So then not only did Jim come in every morning and call him Bones, but also told him about the dreams he’d had last night. And they were dumb, they were so dumb, but God help him, after he left Leonard inevitably spent the next fifteen minutes grinning like a dumbass. 

“--So I wasn’t even a clown but they made me do it, Bones, they made me run the whole damn circus, and by the end of it every single audience member had turned into Uhura and all of ‘em looked so disappointed in me, you know that look she gives you when you--”

“No, I don’t, Jim,” Leonard said nonchalantly, answering an email on his computer. He had taken to doing work while Jim came in for these morning “chats.” He’d realized the more he fought Jim the worse it would be. 

“Well, they all had the look. Trust me, you don’t want that look. Well, if you really want to see it, call her by her first name...” 

The kid continued rambling on about his goddamned dream and Leonard stopped listening, focusing on his email to a parent. Ever since Jim had mentioned it, he was very cautious in the way he dealt with parents. As he was typing away, Leonard suddenly realized how quiet it was. He finally turned from his computer to see Jim sitting in the small chair and stretching his legs out across the office. 

“Are you even listening, Bones??” 

Leonard took his eyes off Kirk's long legs. "Yeah, yeah. Something about how weird your dream was." 

Suddenly the bell rang, announcing the start of the day. "Shit! Bye Bones." Jim ran from the room. Leonard shook his head and turned back to his computer. 

 

Jim ran down the halls, mentally cursing himself for talking with Bones for so long. Well, not so much talking as messing with him. The doctor had been on his mind a lot lately. He couldn't help it; the man was a mystery that Jim needed to figure out by constantly pushing and pushing. 

Jim slowed down as he approached his classroom where a line of children was waiting. 

"Hey Mr. Kirk!" "Where have you been?" A chorus of questions bombarded him as he walked towards the door. "Hey kids good morning!" He opened the door and waved and smiled at his class as they walked in to start the day. 

Even with his tardiness, it was a pretty good day, Jim thought to himself when he sat down for lunch. He had gotten into a good routine with this class and really liked his students. They were pretty nice kids, and all got along. Well, all except for Joanna. He couldn't help but like her, but she had sort of ostracized herself from the rest of the class. 

The other day they had been in the middle of a spelling lesson, and Jim had the kids in pairs working on coming up with sentences for their new words. He tried to pair them up as best he could, but sometimes groups didn’t work out. Joanna was with Christine, but when Jim walked by them, they weren’t even talking, just working on their own. 

"Hey you two, how are your sentences coming along?" 

Christine looked up and shrugged, looking timid. "Um, okay I guess. I'm can't think of a sentence for 'motion,' though. Can you help me?" 

"Well, I can, but I want you to try to work with your partner first. Did you ask Joanna?"

Christine bit her lip. "Um, no." She tapped on Joanna's shoulder. Jim turned away, but continued listening. 

"Joanna, can you help me with number 2?" 

Jim heard an annoyed noise, a tiny, female version of the one he heard multiple times a day in Bones’ office. "Why do I need to help you? Remember I said that we were splitting up the words from the list and working alone." 

"Yeah, but...I can't think of one." 

Jim heard the noise again. "Fine, I'll do 'motion,' you can do ‘country.’" 

Mildly satisfied, Jim continued walking around the rest of the class. 

There had been a few other instances of the same sort. He had tried to intercede and help her get along with the other kids, but she seemed like she wanted to be by herself. 

 

They had been friends a while now. The year was half gone and Bones hadn't thrown him out yet. He did seem to be annoyed by Jim’s very existence, but Jim knew it was all an act. Jim felt he could casually bring up his concerns about Joanna, and he finally did a few weeks later. 

“Does Joanna have any friends outside of school?” he asked Bones one day during his free period. 

Bones looked up warily. “Not that I know of. We haven’t been here that long. Why?” 

“She doesn’t seem like she’s made any in her class yet, and she really should have by now. It’s been months. It’d be good for her.” He’d been seeing how far he could lean his chair back without tipping over, so it wasn’t until he swung back down and saw Bones’ face that he realized the storm brewing across the desk. 

“Joanna's a good, smart kid,” Bones said, anger tight along the edges of the words. 

Jim sat all the way up. “Of course she is. She’s great. But she’s always shutting the other kids down. It’s not good. Kids need to hang out with friends their own age.” Only children were relatively easy to pick out in his classes; they always enjoyed being by themselves, and usually had an easier time talking with adults. 

“She’s been through a lot with the divorce and she’s handling it like a champ. I’m not gonna go telling her she needs to stop being herself to make friends.” 

“Okay, you’re definitely projecting here,” Jim said, leveling a finger at Bones. “Adults shouldn’t stop being themselves to make friends. But kids don’t have the same sense of self yet that we do. They’re always changing and adapting. It’s our job to help them get along, and part of that is learning how to interact with other kids their own age.”

Whoah, that was a mistake. Jim had never seen Bones this angry, and as far as he could figure, Bones spent his life being various degrees of angry. “Look, pal, I don’t need some punk teacher thinks he’s hot shit telling me how to raise my daughter. You know where you can stick your advice? You can stick it right where the sun don’t shine.” 

This was bad. Jim had begun to think of Bones as a friend (and frankly, possibly more than that, if he was being honest) and not as a parent. 

Jim stuttered. "Uh, Bones. I was just trying to help, but I know..." 

Bones didn't let him continue. "How many _goddamn_ times do I have to tell you the name is Leonard! Get the hell out of my office." 

Jim took one more look at Bones' very angry face and ran out the door as fast as he could.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has one of our favorite scenes in the whole fic! Semi based on an incident in E's own classroom...

Leonard could hardly focus the rest of the day.

"Well of course it would hurt falling down from the monkey bars! You should have been more careful!" 

"Why are you crying? It's just blood!"

He was trying not to snap at the kids (he really had gotten better since Jim's initial visit), but it was hard when all he could think of about was that damn Kirk. Joanna didn't need any friends. Leonard got on just fine himself without any. And just where did that kid get off? It wasn’t like he was even a parent, let alone a divorced father trying hard to raise his daughter with his ex-wife. 

"Dad, are you ready to go?" 

Leonard had been so lost in his anger that it was already the end of the day. He swung around from his desk and saw his daughter waiting for him. He tried to give her a smile.

"Sure, Jo-Jo. Just give me a few minutes." 

Joanna gave him a weird look. "What's wrong with you?" 

Leonard sighed. "Nothing, Jo. Just tired. It's been a long day."

As he walked outside with Joanna, the argument was still on his mind. Leonard turned to look at his daughter and, with a flash of a confusing mix of anger and guilt, realized he never really asked her about her classmates or teachers. They talked a lot about what she was learning. Leonard had always been pleased to find that she was following in her father's footsteps and loved science. 

"Jo-Jo, how was your day today?" 

Joanna gave him another weird look. "Why are you asking me that? You never do." 

Leonard chuckled. He hated that question, just like people talking about the weather. When he had conversations with people he liked to asked questions that had more than one-word answers. 

"Well how about this then, who did you eat lunch with today?" Leonard asked. They got into the car. 

"I was with my class, but that's because I have to be. Mr. Kirk wouldn't even let me take my book in to lunch! He told me he wanted me to talk with the other kids. But, Dad, they're dumb! Why would I want to talk with them?" 

Leonard fought hard to keep from laughing. Joanna really was his daughter. 

"Well, Jo. You don't necessarily have to be friends with them, but you do have to talk to them. Unfortunately, you're going to work with dumb people your whole life. But it won't help if you say they're dumb." 

Joanna rolled her eyes and looked out the window. "That's stupid, Dad."

"Yeah, I know." Leonard started the car. “But it’s life.”

 

The kid didn’t show up in his office the next morning, or the next. It was very, very quiet. 

Leonard caught up on all of his paperwork, something he hadn’t been on top of since the beginning of the school year. At the very bottom, tossed there at the outset of the year, was a letter from University Hospital. Just seeing the logo again at the corner gave him an unpleasant shock. 

He threw it in the trash. 

Then he picked it up out of the trash and ripped the seam open angrily. 

It was just an update on his insurance. _Goddammit. Fucking bureaucrats._

He sat there with the envelope in his hands, though, thinking about the hospital, about Nurse Marcus on the second floor and Scotty the IT guy and Hank the security guard and even the president, that goddamn cold-blooded Spock. 

And about the oncology ward. And the operating table. And the morgue. 

“Dr. B--um, Dr. McCoy?” came a small voice from the door. 

Leonard heard the slip. Apparently the damn kid's nickname was spreading. He took a deep breath, trying to tread lightly with the small curly haired boy who appeared. 

"What's up, my boy?" 

The small child looked around his office in a panic and his eyes widened when he saw the skeleton in the corner.

Leonard turned to look at it as well. Grimacing, he realized the "bones" needed to go. 

Turning back to the boy, he tried to smile. 

"I uhhh. Don't feel good. My tummy hurts." 

Leonard sighed. "Okay, let me take your temperature." 

The kid didn't have a fever. He looked a little pale, though. This happened most days he had been working at the school; usually the kid was nervous about something and they just needed to see him just to be sure. 

"You're fine, kid." Leonard topped this amazing feat of reassurance with an attempt at a smile. It must have looked as pained as it felt, because the kid looked even more frightened. 

This day couldn’t end soon enough.

 

 

Jim sat at his desk trying, but failing, to grade his students’ writing assignment. He had made it through about five of them when he got to Joanna’s. Her near-perfect handwriting was unmistakable. 

It had been a hard couple weeks without his visits to Bones’-- _Leonard’s_ \--office. It didn’t help that the cause of the argument was sitting in his class every day. He knew he should apologize, but he still felt like it needed to be said. Jim liked to let kids be themselves, but sometimes they just needed a little help. Joanna clearly did. She still hadn’t made any friends in class, even after more than half a year.

Jim started to read her assignment. For this one, the kids had to write about their family. The writing prompt had been a suggestion in his teacher’s manual and he had selfishly chosen it.

Reading through it, Jim constantly smiled to himself. He could tell through her writing that the kid didn’t want to do the homework, but knew what to do to get it done. She clearly loved her mother and father and didn’t care for her new stepmother. She missed her grandpa, who had apparently recently passed, and her old town, but she liked the librarians better here, so it was okay.

Jim was conflicted. She actually sounded like a pretty normal child. It wasn’t all that much different from the other students’, albeit with much neater handwriting and better spelling. He scribbled a few comments and wrote a score at the top of the paper.

Jim looked up at the clock. _Shit._ He was late to pick up his kids from music class. 

After apologizing profusely to the music teacher, he walked his class back to his room. They were still buzzing about the lesson they’d had. Apparently they’d been told they had to write a _whole entire song_ themselves. 

“You’ll do great,” he promised one kid. “She probably only needs a couple of lines, not a sonata, Pavel,” he said to another kid that was scribbling down honest-to-god sheet music in his notebook. 

Jim ushered his class into the room to start his science lesson. “Okay kiddos, time to check on those seeds we planted last week. Make sure you bring your notebook and pencil!” The kids slowly made their way to the windowsill. 

A few kids were chatting and still at their desks. “Boys and girls, the rest of your class is patiently waiting over here.”

Joanna was waiting proudly at his side, looking expectantly towards the plants. “I like how Joanna is waiting and ready to learn,” he said.

The rest of the kids finally made their way over. Her partner Pavel was moving slowly, and Joanna glared at him as him moved over next to her.

Jim introduced the activity and the kids got to work observing their plants. Jim walked around checking out how the students were doing and helping them with their work. He made his way around to Joanna and Pavel, who he was surprised to see didn’t seem to be doing their assignment. As he walked over, they stopped talking and looked toward Jim with wide eyes. 

“How’s your plant doing? I don’t see any observations in your notebook.” 

Joanna blushed. Jim gave them both a look and walked away, but still kept his attention on them. 

Joanna whispered something in Pavel’s ear. Then, all of a sudden, Joanna yelled and pointed at his desk. “Centipede, centipede!” 

The classroom was instantly filled with the screams of twenty-five children. Desks scraped as kids crowded away from the front of the room. Jim whirled around, looking for the thing. 

Two weeks ago a centipede had shown up in the classroom, a big hairy thing with about a billion legs, Jim wasn’t an entomologist. It was on the ceiling and the janitor had to be called and It had basically shut down all of his language arts lesson. Since then kids had claimed to see it show up again at least twice and extensive searches had not revealed anything--but Joanna didn’t seem like the type to get excited and make things up. 

“I wanna see!” bragged Janice Rand. “I’m gonna catch it!” She got down on her knees and stuck her head under Kirk’s desk. A few of the braver kids were coming up behind her; the rest were chattering and yelling across the room. 

In all of it, he barely heard the whispered “Mr. Kirk,” from his side. 

Joanna was next to him, brown eyes big and serious, and beside her was Pavel, looking miserable and--damn. A big dark circle on his pants. 

“Okay, Pavel,” he said, crouching next to him, “go get your backpack out of your locker. You have a change of clothes with you, right?”

Pavel nodded. He was a cute kid, all big eyes and overexcitement, but he was definitely a pee-er. Had been ever since kindergarten, the other teachers had warned him. Most kids grew out of it by now; a few didn’t. 

“Sorry Mr. Kirk,” he whispered. 

“It’s no problem, kiddo,” he said. “Just go to the bathroom and change and come right back, okay?”

Pavel nodded again and escaped, and Kirk turned his attention back to the supposed centipede at the front of the room. Then he turned back as a thought suddenly struck him. “See me at the end of the day, okay, Joanna?” he said. 

After a full 15 minutes lost from his science class, Jim finally convinced the kids that the centipede was gone and got them back on track. The kids finished their observations of their plants and the day continued on without any other “sightings.” 

By the end of the day the kids were wound up and Jim was ready to see them gone. Then Joanna approached his desk shyly, twisting the strap of her backpack. “I’m sorry, Mr. Kirk. I didn’t actually see the centipede.” 

“I know, Joanna,” Jim said with a smile. “But that’s okay.” 

Joanna looked confused. “That’s...okay?” 

Jim smiled even wider. “Yeah, don’t worry about it.” 

Joanna still looked distressed, so Jim motioned her to come closer. “I know why you did it, and that was a very nice thing you did for Pavel.” 

Joanna shrugged and looked away. “It was not a big deal. He needed help.” 

“It was a wonderful thing, Joanna. I think we should tell your dad.” 

She shrugged again. “Oh, all right.” 

After bringing his class to the front doors for dismissal, Jim walked Joanna to her father’s small office. 

He hadn’t seen the doctor face-to-face in a few weeks. Jim felt he had given Bones ample time, and hoped this would help mend things. But he still felt uncharacteristically timid as he approached the office. 

Jim took a deep breath and knocked.


	4. Chapter 4

The stony face that greeted him was not promising.

“Hey, Bo-- _Leonard_ ,” he said awkwardly. “Erm, I wanted to talk to you about something Joanna did in class today.” 

“Well I’m sure it’s nothing I can’t handle, being a _parent_ ,” Leonard said. 

Still not over it then. Jim knew he probably shouldn’t continue, but now he was just thinking about Joanna. His friendship/relationship/whatever with Leonard didn’t matter now. 

“I just wanted to make sure you knew she did a good thing in class today.”

Leonard’s scowl deepened. This really was not turning out to be the reunion Jim had imagined. “What? She do something that met with your approval for once?”

JIm looked towards Joanna. She was looking back and forth between the two men, but seemed unfazed. 

Leonard sighed. “Jo, go wait by the car. I’ll be there in a second.” 

“Hey, you did good today, okay?” Kirk said, giving her a little pat on the shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow in class.” 

When he looked up he saw that this, if anything, had served to make Leonard madder. He was standing up, both hands flat on his desk. Jim’s heart sunk. 

He was glad to see Leonard’s face, though, as mad as the man looked right now, and that made his heart sink even lower. Hoo boy, he was in trouble.

“Now,” Leonard said, “what’s this about my daughter.”

Jim held up his hands. “It’s good, Leonard, I swear it. I haven’t come to give you a lesson and I’m sorry that I did before, okay? She did a wonderful thing in class today and it hasn’t got a single thing to do with anything I taught her.” 

Jim chanced a glance at Bones before continuing. Bones had now stood up straight and crossed his arms. He still looked pissed. 

“Well..um...” Jim couldn’t believe he felt so nervous. He needed this to go right. He needed Bones back. 

“Joanna was very helpful with another student today. It seems I was wrong about her.” 

Bones had raised his eyebrows. “Oh, so you don’t know more than me, her father.” 

Jim sighed. “No, I’m sorry I implied otherwise. She’s a great kid, and has a great father.” 

Nothing. “So what happened,” Bones said, his voice flat.

Jim explained the whole saga, from fake centipede to real pants-wetting, speaking mostly to the air to the left of Bones’ head, where the skeleton used to hang. When he’d finished, there was a long moment. 

And then Bones let loose a snort of laughter. 

Jim looked up. 

“So she caused a stampede to cover up this lil’ kid’s pants. Man, and I bet this is just another day in your class.” 

“You don’t know the half of it!” Jim said, cautious but eager, so eager to get back to the way they used to be. “Last Thursday the music teacher was playing a game, man, I guess it was just kids bouncing to the beat of a song but from down on my floor, it sure sounded like a full parade marching band. Some of the ceiling tiles came loose and I didn’t hear about anything else the rest of the day. Couldn’t even get through our lesson on using rulers, let me tell you.” 

“Those damn ceilings!” Bones was _smiling_. Was Jim really off the hook? “This place really is crumbling. I’ve heard it from Uhura, it’s that damn cheap administration. Mostly the superintendent, right? Way she tells it, the man’d squeeze a quarter so hard the eagle screams.” 

“Yeah,” Jim said, daring to believe. “Yeah, he’s awful.” 

Bones was leaning back in his chair, giving him a piercing look. Unsure of his position, Jim hadn’t sat down. 

“He’s not the only awful one around here, seems like,” Bones said. “Some of the parents round here really just are unbelievable. Like you warned me about, that first day.”

Jim, who had been told many times in his life that he just needed to keep his big mouth shut if he knew what was good for him, actually managed, in this one moment, for the first and perhaps last time in his life, to do so. 

“Parents that don’t like hearing the slightest suggestion about their kids,” Bones went on. 

Was this a trap? It had to be a trap, right? Jim didn’t think Bones was the type to lay a trap. He’d just march right up to your face and tell you what he thought.

Bones searched his face. Then he brought his hand up to scratch behind his ear. “I’m tryin’ to apologize, kid.”

“You--? Uh?” Jim said. “You don’t need to. Really. I was overreaching and I--” 

“Siddown, kid,” Bones said, and Jim sat. “Jim. Do you know who I am?” 

Wow, another question he had no idea how to answer.

“I’m a surgeon, Jim. A damn good one. Until last year, I was the senior chief of surgery at University Hospital. Publications, awards. My patients flew in from all over the world.”

“I know,” Jim said softly. Bones looked at him. Bones looked--tired. “I googled you.” 

“So tell me then. Did you ever wonder why a top-10 orthopedic surgeon came to work as a nurse part-time at a suburban elementary school?” 

“You don’t have to tell me,” Jim said immediately; he wasn’t sure why. But Bones’ face softened a little. 

“I want to,” he said. “Jim. My father was diagnosed with cancer a year and nine months ago. Pancreatic. Adenocarcinomic. I don’t know if you know much about it, but pancreatic cancer is bad news. Up there with the worst you can get. It ain’t close to the surface so by the time you get a diagnosis, you’re usually good and fucked.” His hands, long-fingered and square, tangled as he talked. “My father had a few months at most. He was 76, said he’d had a good long life, long enough to see his kids off in the world, meet his grandkid, and drink a lot of bourbon. But all I could see was the years he had left, you know?” 

Jim wanted very badly to reach out and take one of Bones’ hands, still twisting anxiously around each other while the rest of him was deadly still. He did not.

“You almost never operate on pancreatic cancer that stage. Well Jim, I was such an arrogant motherfucker that I knew I could do it. I could give him that extra time. I convinced him to let me try. And I--”

He’d been close to flat as Bones ever got until this point, but his voice finally cracked open, and Jim could hear the tears in his voice as he said: 

“Jim, I opened him up and when I got a look at that thing I knew I couldn’t do it. Too close to an artery. But I was this far in; I had to try. And when I did, it--he--” 

“Leonard,” Jim said softly, and the good doctor put his hands over his eyes and shook quietly. Jim couldn’t stand it: he leapt to his feet and then paused next to Bones, not sure what to do, and finally reached a hand to grip his shoulder. 

Incredibly, Leonard’s hand came up to cover his. Jim squeezed his hand tightly. 

They stayed there, afternoon sun streaming in through the window across the desk, until Leonard heaved a great sigh and wiped at his eyes, letting go of Jim’s hand. Jim let go, but stayed next to him.

“Well, now you know,” Leonard said gruffly. “I quit the next day. And here I am.”

Jim gave him a small smile, still not believing his luck. “Thank you for telling me. I know that couldn’t have been easy.” 

Bones nodded and stood up, stepping away from Jim. “Well, Joanna’s waiting for me. See you tomorrow, kid.” 

Without another glance, Bones picked up his small briefcase and left the office.


	5. Chapter 5

Joanna was standing by the car, tapping her foot impatiently. 

“Took you long enough, Dad.” 

Leonard snorted at the sight. “Sorry, Jo. I’ll make it up to you. Why don’t we swing by that ice cream place you like on the way home?” 

Joanna brightened visibly. “I can get whatever I want?” 

“Of course, Jo-Jo.” 

Leonard was glad that Joanna was just as non-talkative as he was. He looked at her in the rear view mirror, bouncing along happily to the music as they drove. He needed some time to process all that had happened in that tiny closet office. 

He’d told him. 

Very few people aside from his family even knew.

It had seemed right in the moment. He hadn’t seen Jim in weeks and he missed him. He actually _missed_ him. 

Things would go back to normal now. Hopefully the kid was smart enough not to treat him any different. 

He felt…

He felt okay, though. Sort of limp. The calm after the storm. A hunch he didn’t know he’d been carrying in his shoulders was gone. Relaxed? He rolled the word around in his mind. Was that what it was? He couldn’t remember the last time he could have described himself that way. 

 

Ice cream cones in hand, Leonard and his daughter sat down at a table in the back. 

Joanna looked content as she licked her ice cream, which was already dripping onto her hand. She noticed him staring and gave Leonard a chocolate-filled grin. 

After a few more messy minutes, Joanna gave him a serious look. “So did Mr. Kirk tell you what happened today?” 

And here Leonard was thinking the ice cream might have put the whole thing out of her mind. He had been planning on talking about it with her, eventually. 

“Yes. I’m very proud of you. That was a good thing you did.” 

“Even though I lied? There wasn’t really a centipede.” 

Leonard laughed and reached his free hand out to squeeze her shoulder. “Sometimes little lies that don’t hurt anyone are okay. This was an okay lie. It was the right thing to do for your friend.” 

“He’s not my friend, Daddy. But some of the kids in my class are so mean and I just wanted to help him out.” 

Goddamn, she was a good kid. Then he thought of Jim’s words.

“How come he’s not your friend, Jo-Jo?” 

“Why would he be? I like Pavel, but I don’t have any friends.” She said it so matter-of-factly, but it’s still broke Leonard’s heart a little to hear it. 

“You should try to make friends. You would have more fun in school. Not everyone is dumb, Jo. And even if they are, they’re still nice to have around and talk to.” 

He smiled as his mind jumped right to Jim. 

“Is Mr. Kirk your friend? Why were you so mad at him?” 

Leonard froze as he bit into his ice cream cone. It was like she was reading his mind. This kid never missed a beat. 

“Did you say you were sorry? That's what grownups say. Please make up with Mr. Kirk. He’s been making you grumpy.” 

Leonard laughed into his ice cream. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I did.” 

“Did you kiss? That’s what you do when you love someone right?” 

Leonard coughed as he choked on a piece of cone. Joanna stared at him, her ice cream cone long gone. After a few moments, his throat finally clear, and a light pink on his cheeks, Leonard responded, “Where would you get the idea that I love him?” 

An exasperated sigh. God, she really was his kid. “I just know, okay? He loves you too, Daddy. Don’t worry.” 

Leonard chuckled to himself as he wiped his hands on a napkin. He pushed one towards Joanna, whose hands were still covered with the remains of her chocolate chip cookie dough. 

“Mr. Kirk and I are friends, and I do care about him...” Leonard suddenly remembered that he had actually held Jim’s hand today. Maybe she wasn’t totally off the mark...no. This was silly. It had been a moment between two friends in his moment of weakness. Nothing more. “But it’s not that kind of love, sweetie.” 

"If you say so, Dad.” 

 

The next day Leonard walked into his closet disguised as an office and there was Jim, sitting there as if this was a normal day. 

“Hey Bones!” he greeted with his too-damn-cheery-for-7-a.m. grin. Bones could feel himself wanting to smile back. It really was good to see him. A grin pulled at the corners of his mouth, so he forced himself to scowl instead. He walked around Jim without responding and put his briefcase on his desk. 

“Can you believe it’s almost the end of the year, Bones? I gotta start working on my grades.” 

At this point, Leonard would usually start to tune Jim out and he would start to do work to prepare for the day. He couldn’t seem to look away from Jim’s bright eyes. 

“Bones are you okay? You almost look happy this morning. Never thought I’d see the day.” 

A blush flooded Leonard’s entire face and he looked away. 

"Yeah, yeah. I’m fine,” Leonard stammered out awkwardly. 

This--what was _happening?_


	6. Chapter 6

Joanna’s mother was out of town, so Jo-Jo stayed with him the full week. It was goddamn--nice, to hear her little feet banging down the hallway of a Sunday morning; to make pancakes, the only cooking specialty he’d ever mastered, and eat them with her on the picnic chairs on his balcony. 

There was that _relaxed_ thing again. 

She was full of chatter about summer science camp, which Pavel was apparently also going to. Leonard was somewhat less excited, since it would be two whole weeks with her away from home. 

There was a time, when he was chief operating surgeon at the hospital, that he’d barely seen his daughter for two weeks at a time, even though he’d lived in the same house with her.

He probed the feelings cautiously. No, he thought, watching Joanna’s little legs swing back and forth on the plastic chair, pancake syrup dripping down onto her bright pink leggings, no, he did not want that life back. He could hear the call-- _you could do so much good_ \--but only a faint echo, when once it had drummed in his ears.

The echo led him, though, later, lying on the couch in the heat of the afternoon as Joanna napped, to pull up his email and search for a name he hadn’t wanted to think about for a long time.

 

The last day of school was field day. Jim was in full Jim form--extreme, really. He should have been a high school track coach, Leonard thought idly, watch him bounce along next to his second-graders, shouting encouragement as they relay-raced with water balloons against the kids from the other class.

He just had such a goddamn bright smile. The sunshine outlined his hair in fire and the long, lean line of him as he picked up his water bottle and--

Leonard blinked. Oh, no. Oh no, no. 

Jim jumped up and down with the kids as they celebrated their victory against the other class. Leonard couldn’t look away as Jim smiled and gave high fives to his students. 

He was so lost in his own little world, his whole being focused on Jim, he didn’t even notice when his own daughter was standing next to him. 

Until she poked him in his side. “Dad. Earth to Dad.” 

Leonard shook his head and looked down at his daughter. “Sorry, Jo-Jo, what is it?” 

He was happy to see that the kid, Pavel, was next to her. Joanna had been talking about him a lot lately, and her mother had shared that she had been on a few play dates with him. 

“Pavel fell while we were playing, can you take a look at it?” 

The kid looked a little shy, but Joanna muttered to him and pushed him forward towards Leonard. 

“What happened, little man?” 

Pavel’s eyes filled with tears as he gingerly held his elbow out. 

There was a little scratch with a small amount of blood. Leonard opened up the small bag he had brought. 

“This will sting a bit.” He wiped off the cut while the kid winced but bore it stoically. Then he pulled out a band-aid and put if over the now clean cut. 

“There good as new!” He patted Pavel on the head and tried to give him his best smile. 

“Bones, you really gotta stop smiling at the kids. You’ll scare them. Mr. Scary Bones indeed.” 

Jim was right next to him, his arm thrown around Leonard’s shoulders. He felt like a goddamn teenager, his heart racing. 

Leonard threw off Jim’s arm. “Okay you two. Go onto the next game. I think it’s second grade’s turn to play kickball.” 

They both looked as if Christmas had come early and then took off running towards the field. 

“See, look. I’ve gotten better,” Leonard said smugly to Jim. They both watched as the kids ran and started the game. 

“This year--I gotta tell you, I wasn’t expecting much out of it,” Leonard said absently. “But I’m gonna miss these damn kids.”

Jim’s eyes darted over to him. “Miss them?” His face was perfectly neutral, open and curious now, but Leonard could have sworn he’d seen it fall a little first. 

“Yeah,” he said. “Called an old friend up, back at the hospital. Figure it’s really time I got off my ass.” 

“That’s--that’s good,” Jim said, and maybe Leonard was making up that split-second hesitation before it came out again, but maybe he wasn’t. “I knew you’re meant for bigger things than--” he gestured at the first-graders in the distance, trying and mostly failing to play kickball. “We’re gonna miss you, is all.” 

“Miss me? Kid, you think you’re getting rid of me that easy?” 

And the light that spread slowly across Jim’s face as he turned to look at Leonard was really a thing of beauty. 

“Naw,” Leonard said, nudging Jim lightly with a fist. “No sleep, running all over hell’s half acre, no time to see my kid? Naw, that life’s not mine anymore. Don’t want it back, either. Gonna volunteer at the clinic, 15 hours a week. The other 20’s gonna be here, wipin’ snot and kissin’ booboos.” 

“Bones, you’ve never kissed a booboo in your life.” Jim was still grinning. 

“Shows what you know. No medicine like a kiss.” 

“Oh?” Jim’s eyebrows went up. Way up. “Is that official medical advice?” 

Bones grinned, exposing all his teeth. “You questioning my medical credentials, kid?”

The whistle blew, and the gym teacher yelled for the kids to line up. In the parking lot, parents waved at their children. From the baseball diamond Joanna turned, scanning for Leonard. Jim heaved himself off the brick wall. “I’ll be sad to see Joanna go. Great kid, that one.” 

“Naw, it’ll be all right. You know why?” Bones said. 

Jim frowned, turned to look at him.

“You won’t be her teacher anymore.” He arched an eyebrow. 

“I won’t--be her teacher anymore,” Jim repeated. 

“Nope. Not an ounce responsible for my daughter or her grades.” 

“I--” Jim said, staring at him like he couldn’t believe his good luck. “Bones--”

“The Whistler. Eight o’clock this Friday.” 

Joanna ran up to him, and he swung her up onto his shoulders. “Bye for now, Mr. Kirk!” she said. 

“Bye, Joanna,” Jim said sort of dazedly. 

“See you there,” Leonard said, and left to head into the bright summer sunshine with his daughter on his shoulders.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! Thanks for all the comments/kudos. We've appreciated it. Sorry this is a really short one, but didn't want to end it with the last chapter so here you go!

_August_

 

Leonard drove up to school, his daughter in the passenger seat. She had shot up like a weed over the summer and was now tall enough to sit up front. 

Joanna was bouncing up and down as he put the car in park. “Excited about school today?” 

“I’m so excited to meet my new teacher and see Pavel!” 

He leaned over to kiss her on the forehead. 

Leonard was almost as excited, although you would never see him bouncing up and down. He hadn’t seen Jim in a few weeks, since he had taken Joanna on a vacation right before school started. 

He walked into the school feeling so much freer and relaxed then he had last school year. Joanna came into his office with him and sat down on the chair, her feet almost touching the ground now. 

He was opening his laptop when he heard a familiar voice. “Good morning, Bones and Jr. Bones.” 

Joanna laughed at that and ran to give him a hug. 

“Geez, Bones what are you feeding this kid?” He hugged her back and patted her on the head. 

“I know, we had to get her all new clothes for school this year.” 

Jim walked over towards Leonard to greet him, but paused awkwardly, like he didn’t know what to do. 

Leonard felt the same. It had been weeks, and he wanted nothing more than to have a private moment with Jim. 

Jim’s face got unnaturally pink and he rubbed the back of his neck. “Hey, Bones. Good to see you.” 

Leonard nodded towards him, his face hot. 

“Mr. Kirk?” Joanna called politely from the chair. They both turned to look at her. 

“You can kiss my Dad if you want to. I don’t mind.” 

Leonard couldn’t help himself: he burst out laughing even as Jim flushed even more. “Oh, Joanna.” He reached out to give her a hug. 

She looked confused. “What’s so funny, Daddy? Don’t you love Mr. Kirk?” 

He squeezed her shoulder. “I do, Joanna. I really do,” he said, staring up at Jim, who actually had tears in his eyes. 

“Okay kid, you got it.” Leonard pulled Jim towards him and gave Jim a quick peck on the lips--lightly enough, apparently, that Jim looked disappointed when he pulled away. Leonard rolled his eyes. 

Joanna bounded from her chair and ran up to hug them both at the same time. “Now I can see Mr. Kirk all the time!” 

The bell rang. Joanna looked up at the pair of them. “Time for the new school year!” She gave each of them one more hug before she grabbed her bag and set off towards her new classroom. 

Jim needed to leave too, but once Joanna was out of sight, he pulled Leonard towards him. “What are you doing?” Leonard asked as Jim’s arms wrapped around his waist. 

“Greeting you properly,” Jim said, his face inching closer and closer. 

“But we’re at school. And you need to go see your class…” Leonard said, fighting a losing battle as Jim continued to get closer, his eyes looking bright and big. Leonard sighed, pulling Jim tight against him. “Oh, all right.” They kissed passionately for a few moments. 

“Jim, you really should go.” 

Leonard gave him a final kiss. “I know, I know.” He reached over to fix Jim’s tie. “Have a good first day, Mr. Kirk.” 

Jim winked as he opened the door. “We’ll finish this up later, Leonard Horatio...” 

Leonard’s eyes widened. 

“Goddammit Jim!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!


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